Where to start with this post? I am all too aware of how difficult older child adoption is. I know how hard it is to expect one thing and get another. But I also know that all of these kids are mine. The ones who arrived after 9 months of puking and the ones who arrived after 9 months of paperwork. They are ours. There are no guarantees with pregnancy. There are no guarantees with adoption. There are no guarantees in life. Just as I stated in my post about my son who we were told would be born with irreversible brain damage, there was not an option for us about what we would do. He is our son.
There is a situation with a family who adopted a DEAF child from Ethiopia. You can read a little about my experience with this child from a post I wrote after returning from Ethiopia. I capitalize the word deaf because they were told this child was deaf. They were told by many people, including me. Now somehow... they feel they weren't given all the information about this child.
I absolutely fell in love with this child while I was in ET. Energetic... Wild... Crazy... Hysterical... I'm sure that life with this child isn't easy. I could have told you that from the little time we spent with him. He locked himself in our car at the orphanage... he was determined to go home with us.
This child is now being given the opportunity to go to a boarding school for the deaf. He will come home once or twice a month and on holidays. Is this an opportunity? Trading one orphanage for another... While I know this couldn't have been an easy decision to make, and I certainly don't know what things were like in that family, I am begging you to reconsider. Reconsider keeping your son home with you. Use that money you would spend on a fancy boarding school to get a special tutor. Do whatever it takes to keep him in a family. Or consider disrupting the adoption. Give him up and allow a family to take him who might be able to handle him. It's not a matter of what it looks like to everyone else. It's not a matter of obligation. It's a matter of making things right for this child.
And to everyone else, please continue to pray for this child. Pray for this family. This decision couldn't have been easy. The dreams and expectations for this child, this adoption, have been squelched. Everything they thought would be is not. Families are continuously evolving. There is no right or wrong. There is no exact science on what to do. There is not a way to plan for the way things will be. We can only evolve and be flexible and continue to grow together. Tomorrow will be a new day.
"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34