Thursday, April 30, 2009

So what do you do?

What do you do with a pre teen boy who hasn't been parented?

What do you do with a pre teen boy who doesn't know how to be parented?
What do you do when you don't know what to do?
My relationship with Josh has had it's ups and downs. We seem to do OK for awhile. And then... boom... I get hit with a dose of reality. Josh does not like to be parented. At least not by me. He takes offense and pouts with every single thing I do. As long as life is going along swimmingly and I don't rock the boat, we do just fine.
Then comes homeschooling long division. And correction about behavior. And punishment.
And in reality, I am the one who suffers the most punishment. I get the glares. The silent treatment. I get ignored. I get ostracized.
Clearly, teaching him how to do long division and how to read is a crime.
We've come a long ways... but clearly, we have a long ways to go.


misschris said...

I feel for you, Gina... I can't imagine. The 13yo in our house is trying enough and we've been at it since day 1... Deep breaths and red wine help much? ;)

Robyn said...

If it's of any comfort to you, most parents of preteens (no matter what their story) express the same things you do here.

Denise said...

Oh I feel you!!!! My unparented child may not be a pre teen yet, but oh how I know!!!! prayers for you!

Larsons said...

Make division like a game. unlock the mystery. Goal, spy, the stricker. Think like an eagle in flight. I spy the unveiled answer. mom

Laurel said...

I will tell you, that while most pre-teens and/or teens may have their times of being unwilling to learn from mom .... I KNOW what you are talking about with Josh, and it is NOT the same. I have had 7 bio. teens go through the teen years. My 13 y.o. adopted son (came home at age 12) has a WHOLE lot of issues that differ from my bio. kids.

I KNOW what you are talking about Gina, and I feel for you. Last week I wrote a post, with 4 links, from parents that are facing some of the same stuff. I hope you'll read it.

These kids certainly know how to play the "control game" with us moms.


mama of 13