Text Message Tuesday

Do you get annoyed with that person busily texting next to you? Well, no need to be annoyed, each and every text message serves its' purpose. There are text messages that give details, for us, this is usually who needs to be where at what time? What's for dinner? Don't forget to...

Then there are those text messages that just make you laugh hysterically, and don't forget those text messages which just simply help us share our lives with those we love.

And now... my favorite text messages of the week.

Don't judge, just sit back and enjoy.

*some text messages are really just bragging about my parenting ninja skills

Message: "I just caught a bee in a quarter pounder box. I'm so good! Jameson just said "that's the first thing they're told... not to talk to humans. Except it was hooo-mans."

Reply: "That's really funny."

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*some text messages are just ways to highlight how wonderful our children really are...

Message: "Adventures in sleepwalking: .... just came in my room and said "um um my hair um my hair, it jiggles, with my hand, and so um I'm mad with the jiggling."

Reply: "Hahahahahahaha"

Message: "I said that's awful. Did you hair stop jiggling yet? And he looked at me like I was crazy. I asked if he was ready to go back to bed and he said yes ma'am. Even asleep he has good manners."

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*sometimes people can't just let me be the best parenting ninja in the world and they have to try to show off and out-do me

Message: "Remember how you caught the bee in the quarter pounder box.... well I just killed two mosquitos doin' it."

Reply: "It feels good doesn't it?"

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*some text messages should never be sent, read or responded to.

I apologize ahead of time for this one

Message: "I have been so busy. I haven't done any laundry and just realized I have no clean underwear for work unless I wear a thong for 12 freaking hours. Great!"

Reply: "I didn't wear under wear with my scrubs today. No underwear here either."

Message: "I didn't think I could feel less trashy considering I'm the one wearing a black lace thong to work, but thanks to you, I feel pretty good. Thank you so much!"

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*sometimes text messages are confessions about the frustrations of parenting that only a friend could appreciate

Message: "I just got so angry because ... (my kid)... hadn't turned in his homework for three days, I kicked the trashcan, which was evidently pretty heavy because it hit my oven and shattered the glass."

Reply: "I'm so sorry. Don't feel bad; I almost killed a man at the library."

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Message: "I just told ... (my kid)... he better get to work unless he wanted a live replay of yesterday. He looks at me and say 'not to be rude but if we have a live replay of yesterday you're gonna have to aim for the top oven this time."

Reply: "I'm sorry but THAT is so funny. I really wish I could put this whole thing on TMT (that's what I'm calling text message Tuesday... btw)"

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*sometimes we ask stupid questions...

Message: "My patient's family member has a shirt that says 'Ask me about the T&A Club.' I wonder what that means..."

Reply: "Ask. They want you to."

Message: "I'm scared."

Reply: "Deep down, you know what it is and deep down you want to join."

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*sometimes text messages are examples of the perfect love between mother and son

Message: "I love you."

Reply: "I love you more."

Message: "No. I love you more."

Reply: "No. I love you more."

Message: "No. I love you way more... more than the stars in the sky."

Reply: "I love you more than the stars way way way way way way way way way more than the stars way."

Message: "Moon? I love you more than the moon and the stars."

Reply: "I love you more than the universe."

Message: "I love you more than the sun, moon, stars, mercury, venus, mars, earth, jupiter, uranus, neptune..."

Reply: "I win."

Message: "You lose. I gave birth to you."

Reply: "Ok."

Message: "Ok. You can win but only because I love you more."

Reply: "Sweet."

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*sometimes text messages are just accounts of our adventures

Message: "I took the girls to get their first coffee in a little coffee shop downtown and now they are freaking out."

Reply: "What were you thinking?"

Message: "Now we're at the library. I could live in the downtown library. I love it so much. I want the furniture."

Message: "We just watched a guy propose on bended knee in front of everyone at the table next to us. I took a picture. Now I'm crying."

Reply: "At the library?"

Message: "No... at the little Italian restaurant across the street from the library. Who proposes at the library?"

Reply: "??? I guess the GPS I have linked to your butt must have gone out. Last I knew, you were at the library."

Message: "I will try to keep you updated better about my whereabouts."

Reply: "Thank you! And I bet it wouldn't bother you to be proposed to at the library. You want to live there for heavens sake."

Message: "You are right. That would be the ultimate proposal for me..."

Reply: "I'll remember that... just in case."

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*And then there are those multiple messages when you just have to share something with the people you know will appreciate it

Message: "We just watched someone propose on bended knee at the table next to ours. I took a pic and now I'm crying."

Reply: "Ahhhh sweet. They really upstaged your 38th didn't they?"

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*sometimes text messages are just to remind you that you are missed

Message: "Justine just referred to your room as the guest room. Hahaha."

Message: "I grounded her."

Even though there was no reply because she's too busy enjoying college life to respond to every text I send her, I know she's reading them daily and enjoying every single one.

Don't forget to send me your favorite texts of the week.

I'm sure we all get a kick out of them wouldn't we? After all, why should I be the only one admitting to killing bugs with fast food containers, not having clean underwear, and wanting to kill people at the library?